The invitation: Take what resonates with you, do what you want with it and ignore what is not workable in your reality. You are free, always. It’s your life, your moments, your heart, your family.
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Welcome to Expanded Stepfamily Life!
I'm Christina Marie! (Also known as the Bio-Stepmom Peace Negotiator)
TO START:
I'd like to share with you the "levels of Co-Parenting," from an expanded consciousness-holistic vantage point and how we work with stepfamilies:
The levels of co-parenting in a stepfamily: where a child (or children) go back and forth between two homes.
The base line foundation within the levels of co-parenting is:
Mending fences while building bridges.
The fence would be the biological parents. This includes the time they were together to date and all that the children experienced from their birth to now.
That's the first level.
Biological (mom and dad)
The bridge would be the who in each house post divorce (separation or whatever the status between parents may be)
That's the second level.
Bio-step (mom and stepdad or stepmom and dad)
The third level of co-parenting is everything that happens as the children are moving from one house to another. The space in between. The movement from house A to house B and from house B to house A.
Level one: Biological: Mom and Dad
Level two: Biological and Step (Mom and stepdad’s house and Stepmom and Dad’s house)
Level three: the space between level one and two which the children travel.
In this way, all of the adults involved are all responsible for who they are, what they send out and how mindful they are about doing no harm to themselves, each other and the children as the children experience the full reality of their Expanded Family landscape. Aka level one, level two and level three.
Our company, Expanded Consciousness is all about taking what is and moving it where you want it to go. Where divorced parents usually want their children's lives to go is often the same. It's really the "how," to get them there and "who," should (and shouldn't) get them there that takes parents off track as it relates to what they truly want.
Mending fences while building bridges allows room for the fullness of honoring the co-creation of the precious children, as well as the building of the bridge.
The bio-stepmom compass creator primarily handles level two of the co-parenting levels. However, it also filters softly and adds healing value to level one and level three as well.
Just as the Peaceful Exchange Program primarily handles Level three co-parenting (the exchange between homes) and that program has massive power to positively impact Level One and Level Two Co-Parenting: In addition to helping adults heal in a way that most of their life energy lives in the present which gives them more power to be in solution oriented in the present.
All of the books, programs and coaching sessions offered through Expanded Consciousness are designed for the person who is inspired to by the book, implement the programs or wants guidance into how to take what is true in their family life and move it to the place they want it to go.
What Expanded Consciousness does not do is: we do not help you change the other person to be exactly as you need them to be. We would be sorry about that, however-we have seen miracles happen (mostly in reverent time) for families by not trying to change or control anyone else and instead work within ourselves.
Self love allows you to open your heart. Being full with an open heart makes it much easier to master the Reverent Communication that will work within your stepfamily based on the people in your stepfamily.
below is a file created for your convenience.
Simple Conscious Compass Creator
I'm Christina Marie! (Also known as the Bio-Stepmom Peace Negotiator)
TO START:
I'd like to share with you the "levels of Co-Parenting," from an expanded consciousness-holistic vantage point and how we work with stepfamilies:
The levels of co-parenting in a stepfamily: where a child (or children) go back and forth between two homes.
The base line foundation within the levels of co-parenting is:
Mending fences while building bridges.
The fence would be the biological parents. This includes the time they were together to date and all that the children experienced from their birth to now.
That's the first level.
Biological (mom and dad)
The bridge would be the who in each house post divorce (separation or whatever the status between parents may be)
That's the second level.
Bio-step (mom and stepdad or stepmom and dad)
The third level of co-parenting is everything that happens as the children are moving from one house to another. The space in between. The movement from house A to house B and from house B to house A.
Level one: Biological: Mom and Dad
Level two: Biological and Step (Mom and stepdad’s house and Stepmom and Dad’s house)
Level three: the space between level one and two which the children travel.
In this way, all of the adults involved are all responsible for who they are, what they send out and how mindful they are about doing no harm to themselves, each other and the children as the children experience the full reality of their Expanded Family landscape. Aka level one, level two and level three.
Our company, Expanded Consciousness is all about taking what is and moving it where you want it to go. Where divorced parents usually want their children's lives to go is often the same. It's really the "how," to get them there and "who," should (and shouldn't) get them there that takes parents off track as it relates to what they truly want.
Mending fences while building bridges allows room for the fullness of honoring the co-creation of the precious children, as well as the building of the bridge.
The bio-stepmom compass creator primarily handles level two of the co-parenting levels. However, it also filters softly and adds healing value to level one and level three as well.
Just as the Peaceful Exchange Program primarily handles Level three co-parenting (the exchange between homes) and that program has massive power to positively impact Level One and Level Two Co-Parenting: In addition to helping adults heal in a way that most of their life energy lives in the present which gives them more power to be in solution oriented in the present.
All of the books, programs and coaching sessions offered through Expanded Consciousness are designed for the person who is inspired to by the book, implement the programs or wants guidance into how to take what is true in their family life and move it to the place they want it to go.
What Expanded Consciousness does not do is: we do not help you change the other person to be exactly as you need them to be. We would be sorry about that, however-we have seen miracles happen (mostly in reverent time) for families by not trying to change or control anyone else and instead work within ourselves.
Self love allows you to open your heart. Being full with an open heart makes it much easier to master the Reverent Communication that will work within your stepfamily based on the people in your stepfamily.
below is a file created for your convenience.
Simple Conscious Compass Creator
| Simple Conscious Compass Creator |
Expanded Family Magazine
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Expanded Family Magazine is a free community publication full of education, resources, wisdom and practical solutions for modern families.
Although our definition of “Expanded” exists outside of the traditional (intact) family model, the truth is; any person on the planet -in any family structure -can benefit by reading the articles inside of this magazine. We have also come to understand that ‘family of choice’ includes members of the community who are not blood related, but rather, connected at the heart.
Although our definition of “Expanded” exists outside of the traditional (intact) family model, the truth is; any person on the planet -in any family structure -can benefit by reading the articles inside of this magazine. We have also come to understand that ‘family of choice’ includes members of the community who are not blood related, but rather, connected at the heart.
Navigational Skills for Stepfamilies: The Workbook
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“I was interviewed for this book by Christina, and to see how my anecdotal points of reference have been brought to life within the framework of her "roadmap" for Stepfamilies is remarkable. I grew up a part of two stepfamilies, one highly functional, and one very dysfunctional, and looking back to 30+ years ago, I have always blamed the wrong people (myself included) for the failures and successes of each family. The "blending" of the two families was always rife with animosity and tension. Christina manages to create a 4D roadmap (including the role that time plays in the equation) that everyone can embrace as both guidance for those on the wrong path, and reassurance for those on the right path but who are still experiencing some self-doubt. I would recommend this to all stepfamilies, and even to those considering divorce, so that they can fully understand the broader implications of their actions and decisions.”
~ Schuyler Wickes |
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Women In Stepfamilies Book Mini Series
*Throughout the book series, the flow will be...
Taking what is...moving it, growing it and expanding it through a broader perspective, followed by my personal experiences, with my professional experiences in working with thousands of other Women in Stepfamilies around the globe. Mindfulness in recognizing, each culture has their own systemic system as it relates to all things parental. As always, with all of my books:
The invitation is: Take what resonates with you, do what you want with it and ignore what is not workable in your reality. You are free, always. It’s your life, your moments, your heart, your family.
Much Love
Christina Marie
The Bio-Stepmom Peace Negotiator
Taking what is...moving it, growing it and expanding it through a broader perspective, followed by my personal experiences, with my professional experiences in working with thousands of other Women in Stepfamilies around the globe. Mindfulness in recognizing, each culture has their own systemic system as it relates to all things parental. As always, with all of my books:
The invitation is: Take what resonates with you, do what you want with it and ignore what is not workable in your reality. You are free, always. It’s your life, your moments, your heart, your family.
Much Love
Christina Marie
The Bio-Stepmom Peace Negotiator
Women In Stepfamilies Book 1: Whose Hair is it?
How to Chill out and why it's not about hair...
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"What I often here from biological mothers about “whose hair is it,” is a mindset that everyone should just know, their permission is needed.
However, that’s not really something everyone “should just know.” What we discover is: in marriage (or connection) when partnered with Dad, she just did it. That’s just something mom handled. Rather than something they discussed as something that was hers to do. Therefore, Dad's sudden interest in doing that becomes a violation. That is him disrespecting her as her children’s mother. Trying to take something from her that belongs to her. Something he never did before he met “that woman.” Therefore, the conclusion is: It’s not just disrespectful, it’s intentional disrespect. The intent now becomes malicious and even more so with the help of an accomplice: Stepmom. That gets filled with the rest of it. All of the other stuff- which is put in a folder called: All of the malicious intentional disrespect I’ve been experiencing since way back when. All it takes is one text to open that file, feel the malicious intent as a sensation of here we go again and add that to the file. On and on this goes. |
Women in Stepfamilies: Book 2: Remote Control
How to stay focused on what happens in your home and why you have more power when you do
In 2006, the movie "Click" came out.
On-line you will be able to find the move synopsis reading as follows: "Michael Newman (Adam Sandler) seems to have it all but his wife, Donna (Kate Beckinsale), is increasingly frustrated by the amount of time he has to spend at work. Michael cannot find time to be at home until he meets an eccentric inventor (Christopher Walken) who gives him a universal remote that controls time. At first he happily skips the boring times until he realizes the remote is in control of his life and he learns to cherish all the precious moments with his family." "Until he realizes the remote control is in control of his life"
For women in stepfamilies, when each woman picks up her universal remote control and presses the buttons (trying to control all that happens in someone else's home, her need to control two homes isn't the bigger picture issue.
The bigger picture issue is how many precious moments she misses out on, how much time and energy she is spending trying to control someone else's home… remotely.
All the internal stress that causes her, all the cortisol running through her own blood stream, her inability to be truly present in the present."
On-line you will be able to find the move synopsis reading as follows: "Michael Newman (Adam Sandler) seems to have it all but his wife, Donna (Kate Beckinsale), is increasingly frustrated by the amount of time he has to spend at work. Michael cannot find time to be at home until he meets an eccentric inventor (Christopher Walken) who gives him a universal remote that controls time. At first he happily skips the boring times until he realizes the remote is in control of his life and he learns to cherish all the precious moments with his family." "Until he realizes the remote control is in control of his life"
For women in stepfamilies, when each woman picks up her universal remote control and presses the buttons (trying to control all that happens in someone else's home, her need to control two homes isn't the bigger picture issue.
The bigger picture issue is how many precious moments she misses out on, how much time and energy she is spending trying to control someone else's home… remotely.
All the internal stress that causes her, all the cortisol running through her own blood stream, her inability to be truly present in the present."
He's Not the Dad You Want Him to Be: How to accept who he is and why that helps kids accept who they are
To co-parent with another human being we may not like, may not agree with, may not share the same values, or someone suffers from mental illness or any number of things: How could that not be an opportunity to Answer the
Call to Adventure? To move through challenges and temptations into the Abyss. Death and Rebirth can be symbolic of our capacity to grow into the reality of our co-parenting lives. It could be our transformation that makes the biggest difference (Not the other parents)
For women in stepfamilies, women reject and refuse the call all the time. “I’m not going to educate myself on addiction because I am not the one who is addicted.” Is something that I hear a lot.
This may be true, yet it is also true that you pro-created with another human being whose struggle at this time is addiction. If that is a truth known before or if it lives within the journey of “The Unknown” isn’t as relevant as the opportunity to protect and prepare the children who exist in the middle through educating ourselves until we are able to guide, prepare and be a supportive trustworthy advocate for them through Act 2: Their initiation (Which includes Atonement with the Father) and be there for them with our hearts full for Act 3: The Return. When our children are able to fly and be the master of and feel their own freedom to live their lives.
We can not advocate for something we ourselves are not living. When we try to do it that way, when we try to just talk the talk and not walk the walk, we have less supportive trustworthy power with our off spring.
Call to Adventure? To move through challenges and temptations into the Abyss. Death and Rebirth can be symbolic of our capacity to grow into the reality of our co-parenting lives. It could be our transformation that makes the biggest difference (Not the other parents)
For women in stepfamilies, women reject and refuse the call all the time. “I’m not going to educate myself on addiction because I am not the one who is addicted.” Is something that I hear a lot.
This may be true, yet it is also true that you pro-created with another human being whose struggle at this time is addiction. If that is a truth known before or if it lives within the journey of “The Unknown” isn’t as relevant as the opportunity to protect and prepare the children who exist in the middle through educating ourselves until we are able to guide, prepare and be a supportive trustworthy advocate for them through Act 2: Their initiation (Which includes Atonement with the Father) and be there for them with our hearts full for Act 3: The Return. When our children are able to fly and be the master of and feel their own freedom to live their lives.
We can not advocate for something we ourselves are not living. When we try to do it that way, when we try to just talk the talk and not walk the walk, we have less supportive trustworthy power with our off spring.