Hyperthymesia is a condition that leads people to be able to remember an abnormally large number of their life experiences in vivid detail.
There is a distinction between those with hyperthymesia and those with other forms of exceptional memory, who generally use mnemonic or similar rehearsal strategies to memorize long strings of information. Memories recalled by hyperthymestic individuals tend to be personal, autobiographical accounts of both significant and mundane events in their lives. This extensive and highly unusual memory does not derive from the use of mnemonic strategies; it is encoded involuntarily and retrieved automatically
the neurological foundation of a superior memory
American neurobiologists Elizabeth Parker, Larry Cahill, and James McGaugh (2006) identified two defining characteristics of hyperthymesia: spending an excessive amount of time thinking about one's past, and displaying an extraordinary ability to recall specific events from one's past. The word "hyperthymesia" derives from Ancient Greek: hyper- ("excessive") and thymesis ("remembering").
Due to the small number of people diagnosed with hyperthymesia, relatively little is known about the processes governing this superior memory ability. However, more is beginning to be understood about this condition.
The debate as to whether hyperthymestic syndrome can be considered a distinct form of memory is ongoing. It is also open to question how far it is an all-or-none condition, or whether people can have the condition to different degrees.
K. Anders Ericsson of Florida State University does not believe that sufficient evidence exists to suggest that the skills of AJ and Williams need additional explanation: "Our work has pretty much concluded that differences in memory don't seem to be the result of innate differences, but more the kinds of skills that are developed."
McGaugh rejects the idea that hyperthymestic syndrome can be explained away so easily; he argues that nothing explains how subjects are able to memorise so much: "You'd have to assume that every day they rehearse it... The probability of these explanations dwindles as you look at the evidence."
Cases of hyperthymesia have forced many people to re-evaluate what is meant by "healthy" memory: "it isn't just about retaining the significant stuff. Far more important is being able to forget the rest.'
Significant debate also exists over the limits of memory capacity. Some are of the view that the brain contains so many potential synaptic connections that, in theory at least, no practical limit exists to the number of long-term memories that the brain can store. In 1961, Wilder Penfield reported that specific stimulation of the temporal lobes resulted in vivid recollection of memories. He concluded that our brains were making "continuous, effortless, video-like recordings" of our experiences, but that these records are not consciously accessible to us. However, a study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences suggested that those with hyperthymesia may reconstruct memories from traces and incorporate post event information and associations—a finding at odds with Penfield's video-like recording analogy.
In terms of the research and development thus far, there is a down side for these 25 humans when they are placed into the container of having a "condition" However, I have to wonder....
From an Expanded or Expanding Consciousness standpoint...
What a person with a superior memory can offer the world has to be amazing. As long as..it's not labeled as a condition and as long as, the superior memory person recognizes, their own personal experiences doesn't give them the right to claim knowing anything about anyone else's experience. There has to be a way to train the superior memory brain to generate value for someone with a superior memory of their own experiences so they aren't left with a sense, there is something wrong with them. I'm thinking meditation could be one of those things.
Superior Memory sounds very similar to anyone who has worked through their own trauma's at a deep level.
The distinction that feels most important for anyone who has a superior brain or who has worked through their own life trauma's, I think would be recognizing, your memories of your own existence isn't anyone else's memories. We all experience our own existence differently.
I'm so glad I opted for aloneness these last four years!!!!
Look deeply into the eyes of your own child to find the answer to all of your own questions. 🙏🏼
If you don’t know, recognize or realize that kn every moment, in every exchange you have ever or will ever have with your children -is you having an exchange with their other parent.
To be disconnected from that -is what it means (to me) to not respect, accept the wholeness of your own child.
All any parent ever has to do is Look deeply into the eyes of your own child and all of your answers are right in front of you.
I’ve actually been in a deeply loving and intimate connection with my sons father for 27 years via our son. Plus the years before that of actually being with him and the kids.
This is a very hard concept for people to comprehend sometimes because everyone is so busy projecting their own parenting values, styles and parenting trends onto all parents that they lose sight of this in small and large ways. Families are in crisis at all different layers and levels every minute of every day everywhere and what that means and what they need is to be lifted and helped with a larger life lens.
Inside my own heart space i am very clear.
I love my son and I also respect him.
In the space between him and I we are consistently evolving. This has been true since 1995.
He has earned my respect every time he has taken the step with me to tell me what his boundaries are with me from the center of what he wants and what he doesn’t want.
It has to be his nature that I work with. Where do people think this originated from:
“Take what resonates with you, do what you want with it and ignore what is not workable in your reality. You are free, always. It’s your life, your moments, your heart, your family.”
“Emerson Eggerichs Ph.D., author of Mother & Son: The Respect Effect, explains that girls and boys, in fact, do respond differently to certain words and attitudes. He says that boys have a deep seated need for respect—even stronger than their need for love. Eggerichs encourages mothers to use language that reflects respect and honor to our sons, affirming their character and abilities. Understanding our sons’ need for respect and speaking to them in ways that reflect that respect actually encourages our boys to respond back to us in love—a language mothers know fluently”
The loss of your child’s other parent will literally break your heart. If you are connected at this level.
My son shared the news this would be happening months ago. I was in PA and as I looked into his eyes...the truth of my heart was right there.
My rules for myself have been
1. You must heal your own heart.
2. Put the oxygen mask on yourself so his pain doesn’t drown you. Cause that’s not going to be helpful to him. It will just confuse and burden him.
3. I must not project my own father/loss/pain/trauma -onto him. This felt super duper important from a what it means to be “trustworthy” standpoint.
We are connected.
Our thread is weaved in thickness through generations and it is also equally true -this is his father, not mine.
The equal opportunity that exists inside every parent/child bond. (From my own value system)
This paragraph from Shifting the Sun is very TRUE in my own experience:
“When your father dies, it doesn't matter that other people's fathers have died, that fathers have been dying since human time was born. What matters in the moment of his death is that he was your father.
Your one and only.
Your loss is unique, profound,
YES. YES. YES!!!
This needs to be understood. Deeply.
Very very deeply in my opinion.
My som is going to be speaking at his fathers services. This is extraordinary. His rite of passage. His desire to do so is a stepping stone. 🙏🏼 Family. Sacred ground.
The Legacy of Children. As a Celebration of a Father’s Life.
Joseph Patrick Whinnery. 🙏🏼
Family. Sacred Space.
Our best weekends were the weekends we had the kids. Ian, Erin and Evan. Honestly, it felt like it was way more important that Joseph Bond with his siblings.
They were usually all over him having a blast.
Ian was truly the best big brother, naturally.
He was incredibly kind and sweet to his “Little buddy”
Erin was a little mother. She and Ian often fought over who was in charge of what Joseph wanted :)
Evan had a little bit of a hard time sometimes because she was the baby at moms and Joseph was the baby at Dads and she had a hard time adjusting.
We did our best to understand the nature of what it must be like for her. Mostly her father was deeply in touch with that and would be sure to remind me as we tried to encourage her to see the benefits of being a big sister...she wasn’t always into it. Lol but she was still a very good and sweet little girl who often missed her mommy by the end of the weekend and couldn’t wait to see her.
They were all really great amazing kids actually who never got to met their brother Donovan.
They were all really great amazing kids actually who never got to met their brother Donovan.
This image above of Joe and I is directly when Donovan was taken off all of the machines. In this image, the room is full of family members. We are all literally thinking Donovan is going to stop breathing any second. If you look at Joe's face, Donovan's fathers face, you can see his pain.
It turned out that a nurse named Helen came in and told us all to snap out of it because this little guy could be around for several weeks.
In that moment, we all laughed. I'm talking LAUGHED....
Joseph was one of those babies that choose his father very early on. As a baby actually.
His father was the one who stayed up all night long rocking his cradle back and forth and half the time the man was doing that while he was sleeping.
I’d often wake up to find his dad sitting up against the wall with his eyes closed rocking Joseph’s cradle.
Although Ian, Erin and Evan didn't meet Donovan, Joseph did.
We did all the things to prepare Joseph to be a big brother because he would be with Donovan every day.
Our divorce happened just six months after Donovan died.
Our divorce was covered in love and loss (grief and trauma)
Joe’s grief was extremely different than mine. We were complete opposites in our grief.
There was one thing Joe and I shared as it relates to our parental grief and our trauma...
We both seemed to carry this ungodly fear that something dreadful would happen to our sweet Joseph.
It just showed up in different ways within each of us.
But that special bond between father and son was there before any of this happened.
Copious amounts of reverence and the depth of sadness for his beloved wife who spent years being by that man’s side with three different sets of children. I feel deeply for her and all the children. Ian, Erin and Evan -they were my first amazing experience as a stepmother. I loved them to pieces.
12 years of family life and children's memories went down before her entry point.
FAMILY. My Dad. His Dad. The kids
Shared custody for over a decade.
Loss. Loss. Loss. Loss. And more Loss.
Love. Love. Love. Love. And more love.
All of it.
All before her arrival. That's the full story and always the truth when children are involved and she's pretty good about honoring those types of things because she also had her own story and her own son that she brought with her. Equal ground here. Nothing wrong...just the truth that comes with our children.
that include her. Everyone is included when you are dealing the the emotional well being in a holistic way as it relates to children.
“Out beyond ideas of rightdoing and wrongdoing, there is a field.
I will meet you there 🙏🏼
That’s where my adult son and I meet very often and if we get off center we bring it back as quick as we can.
I thought I’ve already told him every single story but as it turns out. There are all of these Beautful joyful and seriously funny moments he is hearing for the first time. That’s all I have for him now. The amazing good stuff.
Family. Sacred space.
Reverence to everyone holding my son and all family members at this time.
It doesn’t matter that no one is doing that “for me”
But do people understand the expanded impact of a daughters heart or a mothers heart?
The way you are holding him and them. Helps and heals them therefore you are also helping and and healing me.
That man’s daughter.
That man’s mother.
Which brings me to...
Thank you so very much to those who have said the following words:
“My heart goes out to you and your son”
I needed one human being on the planet to say those exact words to me
I didn’t know I needed it until someone said it.
Because it acknowledges and honors our story as a family so fully.
I felt a softness wash over my heart.
Family. Sacred space.
It doesn’t matter who or how it came in.
That teeny tiny acknowledgement -acknowledges all that is written above.
“We honor our parents by carrying their best forward and laying the rest down. By fighting and taming the demons that laid them low and now reside in us.”
― Bruce Springsteen, Born to Run
4 am, I woke up to my sons phone call.
“Mom, Dad is gone” 🙏🏼
my son always told me this song meant a great deal to him because of the love he felt for his Dad. In essence. I’d like to honor their connection by changing the lyrics slightly to match their truth.
A child was born, and his Dad was there. My grandmother wrote a letter to my Aunt the day Joseph was born. She wrote “And big Joe cried when he held his son, it was Beautful.”
His Dad wasn’t away. He learned to walk and his Dad was right there. Joyfully making the biggest deal out of the milestone where our children can walk on their own.
By this time, his father was remarried but the truth remained. His Dad did what he could when he could. It’s just what’s so
football. They had this connection. Proud Football Dad.
All the normal things. When you have a Dad who is there. All the time.
They didn’t get to this place. Sadly. And that’s something my son has been saying, knowing and reconciling every time he expressed “I’m only 27 years old. I still need my Dad”
My son is and has been very much like his Dad and he’s also not all at the same time. Him being his own person and all but my wish for my son at this time is that he honor whatever he needs to honor in whatever feels best to him from the place of the space between him and his dad.
and he recognize how deeply loved he is and always has been.
I think he knows that though.
Im sorry for your loss Son.
I love you so much.
You are doing so well in life and and you deserve that. Please continue to make good decisions the best you can at the time.
Cheers to you and your Father.
May he rest in peace, pain free.
“Experience life in all possible ways --