Fast forward to this week. When I put some attention on this incomplete book I began to feel that aliveness. I recognized, I've been feeling like my writing is "work" which has made me feel like all I do is WORK! I'm working, I'm working...I'm working. As soon as I put my work aside and put this book back to my front and center, I felt this excitement moving through me. I shared this with my friend Natalie and she said "You are very lit up right now!" She could feel my next level aliveness. She could see it radiating outward just as I had been feeling it. I love when people see me accurately LOL
Anyway... I've decided to take a break from the work writing and move into this for the weekend in between other work.
BOOK EXCERPT COMPLETELY UNEDITED.
The last house on the left of Adriana's lived a couple from India. Jenna said they kept to themselves, had no children yet and often had lots of family gatherings over the weekends where the women were in traditional Indian Dress. She said they were lovely gentle people and she still didn't know how to pronounce their names properly but their first names were Dineshh and Sushma.
To the far right of Adriana's house-The Hank family resided. According to Jenna, This family had two teenage boys and everyone in the family was an athlete of some sort. Jenna explained "they are rarely home and now that the boys are scheduled to get athletic scholarships for college so they are all always "in training."
Jenna told her that sometimes she played tennis with the boys mother, Anne Hank. For Jenna, Anne was nice enough and also only ever wanted to talk about her boys and their athletic abilities so she tried to schedule tennis with Anne once a month because that's all she could handle.
Adriana smiled at Jenna's candor. That was one of the several endearing personality traits about Adriana loved about Jenna. A part of what made her an enjoyable friend to have.
Jenna didn't have a filter. She said exactly what was on her mind at all times, in Adriana's eyes that made her a safe and trustworthy person.
The house to the right, directly next to hers was the neighbors Adriana was most interested in learning about though.
That's the house that would be able to see Adriana when she was in her kitchen, her sun room and even her bedroom because all of those rooms had big glass panels instead of walls. The remodel was built with the view of the lake in mind and it was absolutely breathtaking. Looking out any of these rooms offered Adriana a view of the beautiful lake. However the houses were designed where you could also see the house on the right as well.
Jenna's house was surrounded with tall trees that made it seem more private yet still accessible. Adriana knew when the fall and winter months came, her house would be exposed. She would be exposed in a way she hadn't had to think about with the family on the right being away for the summer. She needed some privacy to continue her sensual therapy work. A huge part of Adriana's sense of being a sensual desirable woman had been completely and severely shut off during the final four years of her marriage. Dr Leborski gave her specific exercises and practices for her to do at home to access and reclaim what he says is "rightfully" hers. A return to owning and accepting her own sexual nature and learning ways to Fulfill herself. The theory was, if she was able to access and expand her own sexual energy, enjoy her own essence and body, it would be a beautiful way to live her best life post divorce and moving forward.
This, Adriana felt was critical work for herself.
She had remodeled and redecorated her new home with her needs in mind. The bedroom, kitchen and sun room where the rooms she was most intentional about. To flow through her own home and be able to do her sensuality exercises daily and flow into the rooms she used the most.
She designed her bedroom to bust with Lush amethyst and lavender colors with an obscene amount of white candles every size imaginable, and carefully selected sculptures and other art work that represented and pulled out her sensual desires or had a sacred sensual goddess intention. The master bathroom was also adorned similar as her bedroom with her enormous bathtub and unbelievable 10 shower head shower. It was completely over indulgent and more than Adriana could have ever wanted. The only thing Adriana splurged excessively on though was a sound system that went through every room in her house and with the flip of a switch, also continued to bring the music of her choice out to her backyard.
Playing and summer dinners on the deck as the dinner music played gently in the back while lightening bugs glistened through the back yard leading to the lake, the sound system brought a detail to an already exquisite scene and took it to the next level. She had spent countless hours gathering music choices to accommodate her new lifestyle and the hours have been well spent.
Truly the most relaxing and enjoyable summer Adriana had in a very long time. She had the Walker family all to herself. Jenna, her husband John and little Johnny walker were like family to her now. And it was all coming to an end. The summer, the outside dinners, the ease and peacefulness of an essential ghost town, the privacy.. would all be gone with the season changing and as the family who lived in the house to the right...returned home. Adriana felt something around this change of seasons.
At tea that mid summer day, Jenna had saved the best for last...
The house on the right.
The Dugan family. According to Jenna, the Dugan family is normally home all summer long. However, Lance Dugan took his two daughters Sarah and Shaina to France for the summer after coming home from work and finding their mother had left, again.
Taken by surprise, "Again?" Adriana had inquired
"Yes, again! Jenna explained a little sadly. She continues "Lauren Dugan has a habit of going off her meds and taking off for months. The Dugan's moved in about a year after John and I. We were thrilled because we both had new born babies. We did everything together and boy did we have a lot of fun! There were signs sometimes that Lauren had some mental issues and sometimes refused to take her medication and Lance was a champion with her. He just loves her so completely. During the tough times he would just work his business from his home office until she was well again and sometimes that took a few months. When our kids where about 9 years old, I went over for some morning coffee. Lauren and I were planing something fun for the children. Yet when I arrived the front door was open. Sarah was sitting all alone in front of the TV. When I asked her where her mother was, she told me "My mom left again and she said this time, she's never coming back"
I had to call Lance and break that news to him. I hated having to do that. He was devastated and hired every investigator to find Lauren. He worked from home and took care of Sarah. After a year he got a call that the investigators found Lauren. He dropped Sarah off at our house to go to Mexico to get her. After a few days, he returned with Lauren but we didn't see her or push because we figured there had to be a lot to work out. Two weeks later she gave birth to another little girl. They named her Shaina. Lauren stayed on her meds for about three years after Shaina was born. She took off again, but Lance found her within hours this time because he put a GPS in her cell phone. And now, three years later, she took off again. This time she left her cell phone at home."
Jenna continued on
"I suppose Lance is too tired to go after her again so he took the girls to France for the summer. He's really warn out at this point. John and I are sad about this and there isn't anything we can do expect whatever Lance and the girls need. That's all we can do at this point."
Adriana found herself staring at Jenna with an open jaw. Trying to piece it all together and process everything Jenna just told her. After a minute or so, Adriana said softly,
"Wait, are you telling me that this woman left her husband and became pregnant with another mans baby and he took her back and is now raising that child as his own?"
Jenna sipped her tea before answering. "Yes, that is exactly what I'm telling you!"
Adriana was intrigued and a little baffled by the entire story and this mysterious family. She felt she knew too much and a little uncomfortable with knowing so many intimate details about the inside of the house to the right, the people in it...whom she has never met.
She realized, something else was developing in her. A small part of her already wanted to help this family heal. This was exactly what she was working on with Dr Leborki. Her need to rescue. In her mind she said to herself "The Dugan family is none of my business!" Repeating it over and over again in her head.
"The Dugan family is none of my business!" As she was saying that her sense of their return impinging on her privacy shifted to a level of compassion.
This book.....Is bringing me here....
There are all kinds of ways to excite the senses to have that feeling...and I am so glad
This weekend I am going to stay on this book.