REGARDING MY THOUGHTS ON THIS TOPIC:
In working deeply with women, going where no one wants to go (Not even the women) I am now utterly convinced, many women have been labeled or diagnosed as being bi-polar or some other mis-diagnoses when really all that's happening is the ebb and flow of hormones. If they were to get those handled, balanced and embrace the hormonal factor...learning how to listen to their own bodies, discover amazing ways to make their self care a major priority, knowing the importance of sleeping well. Just having access to the realization that hormones matter can help women do the extra stuff needed (for those who are sensitive to hormones...) if there is an actual need. There may not be a need, until one day...all of a sudden a woman is beyond imbalanced. But then she is labeled again...as crazy or as any other thing. I love it when a woman crosses over the bridge where she was once arrogant and now that she's older, she can no longer afford to be arrogant because-it's her truth now. It's like child birth. More than one young new mother has looked at me and said "Why the hell didn't my mother tell me?" (regarding this or that about child birth.) And even that, some women love pregnancy and giving birth is an orgasmic experience for them. Therefore, it's hard for them to understand any other birth process. Same concept applies with the ebb and flow of when life begins to change again.....
The quality of my hormonal life improved 85% when I removed all of the ass holes from my life. By that, I do mean the self absorbed. The arrogant. The know it alls. Mostly, what I mean is the over masculinized consciousness that is so pervasive. And when I say that, I am not talking about men as a gender.
In fact, since burning my life to the ground and starting from scratch, I feel an incredible level of reverence for the men who have entered my world. What an incredible gift to me to have men who aren't afraid of the feminine chaotic and they do not take it personally but rather -they want to come in and sooth my body or my soul as I figure the subtle changes that are happening to me out-on my own. It isn't all that hard after all. I didn't know that before but I do know that now. I used to try so hard to explain, to educate, to provide information. To share what works and what doesn't work for me as me. To articulate what i know- I need -mostly just alone time and my boundaries to be respected or some extra rest. Or perhaps just a minute to breath so that I could lean in and figure out what would be best for me. My voice is not small after all. I'm not afraid or shy or ashamed to say "I need to be in my moon lodge, please just give me space." In fact, the unstoppable in me needed to be severely tweaked and re-aligned because I would actually spend my good hormonal weeks trying to lovingly express, re-educate and share very clearly what I knew I needed. I was like a god damn broken record. Thinking, one day I will be heard and my boundaries will be respected or at the very least, this one thing about me, could be handled in the same fashion I handle the not so pretty pieces of other people. You know, I've never been blind to the ass hole parts of other humans, it's just that I know I can be one too.
The ass hole in me honors the ass hole in you"
You know that whole "send love," "be love," "have compassion," "don't take it personally." It took me over a decade in some connections to really get...I do need to take it personally because it's impacting my health and my well-being. You know there can really only be one crazy person in any situation, otherwise things can get totally wacko across the board....eventually I noticed, it was easy to pin point me as crazy rather than honor me, my boundaries, my hormones or listen to my truth.
My bible is actually called: A Woman's Best Medicine: Health, Happiness, and Long Life through Maharishi Ayur-Veda. Written by the absolutely fabulous Doctors:
Dr Nancy Lonsdorf
Dr Veronica Butler
and the amazing Melanie Brown (who has her Ph.D and is a research psychologist)
In chapter 11
Menopause, Life Span and the New Age:
Menopausal Symptoms Associated with Vata Dosha
Dry skin or mucous membranes
Constipation or irritable bowel
Reduced libido Menopausal Symptoms Associated with Pitta Dosha
Menopausal Symptoms Associated with Kapha Dosha
Fluid retention, edema
High cholesterol or triglycerides
My only real primary goal as it relates to me living within my own body is to move the way love moves, to be in bliss and joy and all that. Every day. So I do daily rituals to be able to obtain my goals...every day.
And still...the subtle shifts continue to shift. I got it down to a science and then I don't. My clothes are falling off of me, and then they are snug. I'm sleeping 8 hour nights and then I have insomnia. My digestion is on point, and then it's not. Not all at once mind you. I get one thing down and something else pops up.
Right now, I feel absolutely amazing in my brain/body and soul. And this is the day, I make a conscious decision to keep it light, rest, read, restore, regenerate. What I'm doing is working...except I can feel my digestion needs a little push..So
I am drinking warm water every hour to keep my digestion on point because without the water, it wouldn't be on point.
I'm lucky, blessed because I live alone and there is no one around me trying to tell me I'm crazy, it's all in my head or that I have "other issues" or what I "need to do."
I no longer deal with-dealing with 4 other biological parents who all see the world very differently. I don't worry at night what time my son is coming home because he doesn't live with me (If he did, that would be another thing I would need to create a ritual around) I don't have a big house sucking up all of my time and energy or anyone who expects me to measure up to their standards of what it means to be "a woman." In these ways, I feel blessed and lucky to be able to take the time to really honor what I need to keep myself in flow
Many women are not as lucky as I am. They have all that "stuff." All that pressure that comes with all of that stuff.... They could love their stuff more than anything and all of the beauty and love that comes into their homes via their loved ones and still....that's a lot of stuff. Sometimes all a woman needs it a little rest and she's good to go...other times...she needs something else.
What she said to me was "I'm very proud of you for knowing what is going on with you, for handling it with grace and for taking the time to explore holistic options" The acupuncture is really just for the wobbly bits because I feel amazing in my brain, in my soul and actually in my body too...You know...this one life mentality is full blown in me at this point.
Yet, when I hear stories of all the women who have experienced the changes that come in mid-life. It is hellish. Beyond hellish and they lived with that hell for almost a decade sometimes. I hear often "I wish I knew more about that then I did"
There are things that can help women so much beyond food and exercise because sometimes hormones are like depression. They are imbalanced and once they are, you can't see clearly. It's like telling a chemically depressed person "don't be depressed, it's all in your head" that is not useful or helpful. The chemical imbalance is already there. It takes a lot to even just take a walk.
One of my TM teachers said "A lot of the time, women who do too much during the rest of the month-end up with the worst PMS and the answer is to be mindful of how we are living our every day lives"
She also told me "Being alone, resting and honoring our cycles makes us happier for the rest of the month that follows"
Women come in many different forms. So do their hormone imbalances.
I have another friend in Boca Raton. She's a fitness coach. She created something called the metabolic method. Getting control of hormones is a part of the method she created.
Anyway...it's all just a seedling in my head right now...this mini-magazine on hormones Idea. Prompted by a post I saw on facebook. So I would also like some writers who are men who hold some keys in how to deal with this sort of thing when it happens to women because I have to say, the men I am meeting are amazing and know just what to say, just how to handle and so much more. I think their wisdom has equal value...
So that's my rant for today
Anyone who wants to contribute....please feel free to contact me